Monday, September 8, 2008
Trouble Sleeping
Awake like a crazy man. No sleeping for me. Eyes wide shut, something numbing taking place in me. Sleeping seems to be obviated, for there is no peace in it for me. Trying to sleep is like watching my labrador retriever chase a jack rabbit through the German countryside; nearly impossible. I’m seeking for peace at the moment. Just need to get home I guess. This blog, started as something poetic and quickly turning into something journal like. I appreciate the readers who actually give intelligent feedback. It’s as if you read me and feel me exactly where I am. Maybe you picture me now sitting at my desk in this thing we call a “CHU”, more like a tin connex morhped into sleeping quarters. Maybe you can hear the blackhawks land through out the night, and the random “kabooms”. Punching away at keys typing for no reason, just to be typing, maybe it’s therapy. I’m tempted to go to the gym and beat on the 80lb punching bag to remedy my sleep, monotony, and blender of a day. But that is much like the keyboard I’m typing on; it even lacks the satiated relief that I am looking for. Maybe the tunes I’m listening to aren’t helping either: Herbie Hancock The Joni Letters. That’s it for tonight. I’m going to make another attempt at the sleeping thing.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
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Friday, September 5, 2008
Trying to get back
I usually don't write titles until the writing is complete. However, "Trying to get back" just comes natural. Right about now it has multiple meanings for me. 13 months we've been in this country second tour for me. 2 more months to go and yeah, it's rough! Expression has escaped me like watching water evaporate in the 120 degree Northern Iraq baking sun. Gone! But I'm trying to get that back too. The expression that is.
As a young company grade officer and troop commander there is tremendous responsibility getting 114 troops back to their families safely. But it is rewarding. We're at a strange place; soldiers can feel that the mission is almost complete but they know we can't quit and that we're not finish until we affectively transition this mission to our replacements. We've done everything together, sweat together, live together, work together, drive one another absolutely nuts, supported one another, and we're at the end.
The challenges do not cease as spouses are having babies and I have to tell a soldier that he can't go home to see the birth, grandparents passing, mothers and fathers illnesses, family issues, and I have to be the guy to give the brotherly love, tell them I understand but the policy says that I can't let you go. That only adds to their frustration and strain. And mine as well. But my soldiers are professionals and they continue to push forward.
My daughter just started her first day of school, I was fortunate to hear her little funny voice on the other end of the phone with excitement; you would have thought she was going to college! We are looking forward to getting back. And trying to integrate ourselves back into the lives that we knew prior to deploying.
On a positive note, things seems to be getting safer in our area of operations and the Iraqi's seem to be taking charge of the security in our area. This is great improvement from what it was like when we first got here. The attacks on our Forward Operating Base have dwindled. Usually this time of year at the brink of Ramadan, it's like a 4th July gone badly with mortars and rockets instead of fireworks.
I'll be working on getting back to writing and digging deep to stir up my creative side. Until next time, don't forget about the soldiers we think of you daily.
As a young company grade officer and troop commander there is tremendous responsibility getting 114 troops back to their families safely. But it is rewarding. We're at a strange place; soldiers can feel that the mission is almost complete but they know we can't quit and that we're not finish until we affectively transition this mission to our replacements. We've done everything together, sweat together, live together, work together, drive one another absolutely nuts, supported one another, and we're at the end.
The challenges do not cease as spouses are having babies and I have to tell a soldier that he can't go home to see the birth, grandparents passing, mothers and fathers illnesses, family issues, and I have to be the guy to give the brotherly love, tell them I understand but the policy says that I can't let you go. That only adds to their frustration and strain. And mine as well. But my soldiers are professionals and they continue to push forward.
My daughter just started her first day of school, I was fortunate to hear her little funny voice on the other end of the phone with excitement; you would have thought she was going to college! We are looking forward to getting back. And trying to integrate ourselves back into the lives that we knew prior to deploying.
On a positive note, things seems to be getting safer in our area of operations and the Iraqi's seem to be taking charge of the security in our area. This is great improvement from what it was like when we first got here. The attacks on our Forward Operating Base have dwindled. Usually this time of year at the brink of Ramadan, it's like a 4th July gone badly with mortars and rockets instead of fireworks.
I'll be working on getting back to writing and digging deep to stir up my creative side. Until next time, don't forget about the soldiers we think of you daily.
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